Reality Bites, if you will...

I am disgruntled.

I have graduated from my mid-teen, life long dream of being a rock n roll star/artist/writer/slacker. It's never going to happen. I have been defenstrated into the dizzying world of ACCOUNTING(!) by default. My parents were right. I had "nothing to fall back on". I flunked/dropped out of college. I didn't wanna... How do you major in superstardom?? Being rich by way of artisticness, learn how to play power chords and dye your hair to match the ebb and flow of "being in the now"? This is not attainable. Not at the ripe old age of 25.5, which, by industry standards is SO 3 years ago (if not 10..ug).

But this is not about what shoulda coulda woulda been.

This is about what is. And I don't like it.

For a minute there, just a couple months ago, I was content. I had THE BEST boss, the kind you want to go out with after work and crazy-party, but you can't because she's a responsible mommy and has a little boy to consider, but once in awhile you can convince her, since her dad's in town, and he's a free baby sitter, and after a LOOOONNG happy hour you all go to Ft. Myers beach falling down on the street because you wore ridiculous heels and you're trying to find a tattoo shop that's open because you're just THAT drunk that you can muster the balls to get a new one (or fix one that some unmentionable shop did for an UNGODLY price). Yeah. THAT kind of boss. She was awesome. She's still in the company, but at a different location too many miles away for me to even consider realistically commuting to work for.

Now, I work for Mrs. Corporate-my-husband's-an-IT-tech-so-I-can-GETSHITDONE and with Mrs. 60-year-old-grammy-that's-cool-but-senility-is-probably-kicking-in-so-I-don't-really-remember...hey-what-do-you-do-here..wait-what-do-I-do-here?

FUN FUN!!

I work with my boyfriend, and that is AWESOME. There's nothing like calling his extention and proclaiming my need for a smoke and having his cute shining face burst through the office door in seconds flat after my call..But, unfortunately, the current sequence of events has lead me to explore the avenue of seeking an outside position. The "company" I "keep" has made me bitter, and pissy, and talking about work at home far more than I'd like to. The problem is, I don't really have any other marketable, profitable skills. What I do is tranferrable, but I know that experience in the field is key. And I only have experience with the car business.

So, I wonder...is it worth my time to seek another career? Should I just try to sell myself as a generic "accounting" wiz and go to a company that has a product line that better suits my interests? Should I say "FUCK IT!" and really try to do something artistically? I don't need to thrive on art alone, I could market, publish, bu-blahblahblah..if it was just something that interested me...Consumed me.. made me passionate about what I get paid for......

Is this too much to ask????